Valuable Parental Respect (Tetzave)

Valuable Parental Respect (Tetzave)

A child who is allowed to be disrespectful to his parents will not have true respect for anyone. -Billy Graham

The Talmud (Tractate Kiddushin 31a) tells the unusual case where one of the twelve precious stones of the High Priest’s breastplate fell out and was lost. The sages needed to find a replacement for this rare and valuable stone. They found such a stone by a non-Jew in Ashkelon by the name of Dama son of Netina. The sages approached Dama with a great sense of urgency:

“I’d love to sell you the stone,” Dama says, “but the key to my safe is under my father’s pillow. He’s currently sleeping and I won’t wake him up, even for the generous sum that you’re offering.”

The sages leave and presumably find another stone elsewhere. Dama’s great care and respect for his father lost him a tremendous business deal.

God, however, did not forget Dama’s respect for his father. The following year, when the sages found themselves in need of a Red Heifer (a rare and valuable animal required for a vital purification ritual in Temple times), it turned out that Dama was the only one that had one in his herd. The sages found themselves at Dama’s door once again, and Dama knew that he could command an exorbitant price for the Red Heifer due to the circumstance of him having the only one at the time. However, Dama contented himself with charging the amount that he would have gotten for the precious stone he didn’t sell the year before. Thus, God made sure Dama didn’t lose in the end because of his great respect for his father and indeed, Dama’s name has since stood for centuries as a paragon of parental respect.

The Meshech Chochma on Exodus 28:9, where we have the listing of the different precious stones of the High Priest’s breastplate, points out a biblical link to Dama’s story. The stone that went missing in Dama’s story was the Yashphe, the stone that represented the Tribe of Benjamin. Of all of Jacob’s sons, Benjamin was the only one who hadn’t caused his father grief and showed the utmost respect to Jacob (ten of the brothers participated in the sale of Joseph to Egypt – perhaps the biggest anguish in Jacob’s life; and according to the Midrash, in a fashion, Joseph himself was a party to the conspiracy, by remaining quiet about it afterward).

It was therefore appropriate, that the son who demonstrated the greatest respect to his father would merit that God’s concentrated presence, via the Tabernacle, and later the Temple, would reside in his tribal allotment. We find that throughout the centuries of movements of the Tabernacle, it always remained within the tribal portion of Benjamin and the final address of the Ark, in the permanent structure of the Temple, also fell in the portion of Benjamin.

May we always demonstrate proper respect for our parents.

Shabbat Shalom,



To an Israeli government?

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